is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
