Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
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