Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize
