I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
