champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
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