He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
