i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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