Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
