Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
