I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
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