I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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