One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
