Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize