well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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