That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
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