you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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