This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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