just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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