Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
