you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Randomize
