I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
