So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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