I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Randomize
