I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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