With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize
