It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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