if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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