Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
