We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
