So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
