He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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