Will you blow on my dice?
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
