everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
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