I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Found the puke drawer
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
