So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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