you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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