plz talk dirty to me
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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