the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Randomize
