Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Randomize
