and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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