come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
i dont even know how to be here
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
