And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
