You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
