I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Everyone says I win the strip club
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Randomize
