Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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