I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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