I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
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