mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
why is half of my head shaved?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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