woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
We are two peas in an std pod
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Randomize
