You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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